An alternative view on life, politics, and computers
Acquisition of material goods exceeds desire to raise children
Published on January 15, 2004 By Calor In Home & Family

    We live in a society that has increasing access to information but seemingly less willing to actually make use of that information. Every 4 years politicians will argue that things aren't as good as they were in some past golden age in an effort to win the election.

    Nowhere is this myth propagated more than in the area of standard of living. People are told by unscrupulous politicians that today you need two wage earners to make ends meet. Politicians don't want to blame voters for their own material greed. In reality it is our own greed that causes us to need 2 people to work in order to "make ends meet". Our material greed has created life style expectations that we simply can't achieve with one age earner. Any serious study of the past makes it pretty apparent that the difference between life in the 50s and today isn't that we need two wage earners but that we aren't willing to live anywhere near the same lifestyle as people did in 1950.

    In 1970, the average new home was only 1,400 square foot.  In 1950, the average size was only 900 square foot. Today, the average size is 2,200 square foot. A 2,200 square foot house is going to cost a lot more than a 1,400 square foot house or a 900 square foot house.  Similarly, owning 2 cars instead of 1 car costs twice as much, particularly if we insist, as many do, on owning new cars every few years. We also have a great deal more arbitrary expenses such as cable, renting movies, going out to eat and more that all quickly add to the expense tab. We also now demand air conditioning and other home comforts which can add several hundred dollars more per year in costs.

    When you add all these things up, you suddenly reach the point where the average wage earner just can't keep up. It is true that wages, when adjusted for inflation, have remained relatively stagnate. It is also true that essential costs have gone down in cost such as food, housing per square foot, etc.  The blame lies with us and our increasing materialist desires. 

    Most people don't realize how materialist they are because their definition of materialism is based on comparing themselves with a contemporary. That is all well and good until people begin complaining about the "good old days" when a single wage earner could support a wife and 2 kids. The mean American salary could still easily support a spouse at home and 2 children if they were willing to live in a lifestyle that was similar to that during the supposed golden age. Buy a 900 (or even 1200 square foot home), go without cable, don't get air condition and don't go out to eat except on special occasions and a salary of $28,000 will do the job just fine. But few people today are willing to live that way. We want to have the DVD player, multiple TVs with one of them a big screen, we want to go out to lunch at fast food restaurants or go out to a nice restaurant on occasion.

    The problem just is that we don't want a 900 square foot home, we want the 1800 or 2000 square foot home. We want to be able to buy movies and CDs and computers. We want to have the $20 per month cable TV and the $20 per month internet connection. You'll probably want another car too. Which is fine but odds are it'll take more than one wage earner to afford all those nice things. Things that many of us take for granted today. We have lost the ability to differentiate between WANT and NEED.

    At some point, possibly when the baby boom generation came into their prime, the acquisition of material wealth superseded the importance of raising children by a full time stay-at-home parent. I don't really have much opinion over whether that is a good thing or not. What is clear, to me anyway, is that this is what has happened. We want our stuff more than we want to have a parent raising our children full time.


Comments (Page 2)
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on Jan 17, 2004
Also, I think I should address the "Acquisition of material goods exceeds desire to raise children" bit..cause, I think I overlooked it last time.

Take a look at https://www.joeuser.com/articleComments.asp?AID=5011 Heh.

It isn't the material value exceeds desire to raise children, I'm not even a parent and I understand that every parent wants their child to have more than they did.
Whether it be material goods, better chances at schools for knowledge, to a heated/cooled house..It's also piece of mind.
Show me a mother or father* on this board who thinks it is more important to own that new Hummer..than buy their kids diapers and food.
We all want what is best for our children, even if we're big kids ourselves.


*This comment does not include crack addicts or any other various meth users who will abandon all offspring at the drop of a hat for the next score. Nor does it include any mammal or reptile that consumes its own young. Thank you, have a nice day.
This message has been bought and paid for by the Lunaticus Minimus Inc. in conjunction with the Letter M.
on Jan 18, 2004
One change between 1950 and 2000 has more to do with anemities.

The house size argument is one example: 1000 square foot to 2200 square foot is a big change and it's not based on technology. It's based on market forces. Market forces that seem to imply that people have more money than they did in 1950.
on Jan 20, 2004
I think that the problem with excessive materialism is that we tend to become slaves to our things.....& the people who have the most to gain know this. That is why so much is spent on commercialism to get people to buy, buy, buy..especially on credit. In becoming a slave to things people sometime stay on a job that is soul killing just in order to keep those "things" some people stay in crazy deterimental relationships in order not to lose the "things" that they have accumulated with another. I'm not saying that having things is bad. I mean if that is what you like then be merry with it...but, there is a better way to live. That way is to be free enough to pursue the really important things in your life with minimum interference. Such as spending more time with your kids instead of having to do overtime at work to pay the SUV note. This society is based on people living above their means which in turn creates slaves. If you can afford to keep up with the Joneses then do it.....if you can't...then you better think before you spend alot of cash on something that you might not need but desperately want.
on Feb 04, 2004
Quality of life for children I believe is about providing the nescessites. Food, clothes, a decent place to live and education but most importantly love. If people feel that they "want" a huge house and they "want" that new car every few years and that they "want" that bigscreen TV, well I guess they're entitled but I believe that if these things are aquired at the expense that both parents have to work and babies have to be sent to day care (where they could never be cared for like their own parent could) or that school children aren't able to go home to mom or dad after to school then this is where our country is overly materialistic. Now if a couple works together to aquire these things BEFORE they have children and make arrangements so that there could always be a parent at home for them, then I see no problem with people acutally having these expensive things. I think people can be as materialistic as they want but once they have children then the love and care of the children should be the first priority, not the earning of money so that they can afford expensive things.
Just to show that I'm speaking from expierence, my husband and I didn't strive for those material things before our little one came along but now that he's here I am a stay at home mom and because I do not work we live in a 2 bedroom apartment, we drive older used cars and we don't have a bigscreen TV. Aside from that, on my husband's income we are able to eat out at least once a week, we have a computer and internet access (more affordable dial up of course) and still have extra money left over to save or shop occasionally. Trust me we're not suffering because I stay at home, but unfortunately I guess our life just wouldn't be good enough for alot of people.
on Feb 04, 2004
The different points that i wanted to make as i read this article have already been made here and there by other bloggers... but i'm too spun up to not respond with my 2 cents...
Chynna69 got my main point, which is about our willingness to go into debt in order to obtain the things we think we need, but really only want. I managed to put myself into a nice hole, which i'm in the process of digging my way out of.

this is kinda how i see things... In the 50s, the kids of the baby boom were growing up... they were the children of men and women who had just survived a major world war that had a lot of impact on how people looked at life in general. War on a global scale tends to do that to people, as history show us...

let's remember that 50 to 100 yrs ago, agriculture was still a predominant way to make a life in this country...

It's no secret that throughout the history of the US, parents have busted their asses and gone without "the extras" in order to provide better opportunities for their children. How many times have we heard the story of the parents who work blue-collar jobs for 30 years so that their kids can go to college?

but what happens when those college kids get married and have kids? now you have sons and daughters born into families that are not struggling and living paycheck to paycheck... Yes, i know i'm reaching here... i'm not taking into account the huge amount of debt that Americans are in right now.

In the movie "Coming to America" (Eddie Murphy's best movie ever), there's a pretty good example of this. Mr. McDowell tells the story of how when he was a kid, there were 7 kids that grew up in a house that was smaller than his living room. and just look at him now. later he's seen telling his daughter that he "just doesn't want her to have to struggle like he and his wife did"... and it's for this reason that he wants her to marry a rich man... does anyone else see the blaring problem here? does he not realize that it was that "Struggle" that made him into the man he is? i know it's just a movie, but this same thing happens in life all the time.

that's the problem with rich spoiled kids... they never learn the value of anything, because they never have to work for it.

we lost the edge, because for so many years, there have been so many technological advances, but no real struggle for survival. of course, Sept 11th changed that, but that's a whole nother topic.

it's kinda hard to sum up when you bounce around as much as i have so far...

do we know how much is "enough"?
do we know when to stop?
is happiness in getting what you want? or wanting what you have?
can we afford the things we want? or should we just dive into debt to get 'em?
which is more valuable? education or money?

my plan is this: i'm going to finish my time in the Air Force, and then move back to Michigan. back to my roots. where i can trace my family name back to my great great great grandfather's gravesite. I plan to buy my grandfather's farm, and live in the same house that my grandparents lived in for 50 years. I'll take care of my grandmother for as long as she's around. I don't plan to change a thing about that house. I'm going to have a wood burning stove, and i'm gonna chop wood with my uncles. i'm going to farm part time and hopefully teach at the local community college. if i meet the right woman, i'm going to have a foster home for kids with no where else to go. I'll pair them up with a pet from the pound, so they learn the lessons that pets can teach.
most importantly of all, i will live within my means, and i will know when to stop... i'll know when enough is enough. and i'll teach my foster kids the same thing.
on Apr 19, 2004
My husband and I are college educated professionals, with no cable, no big screen TV and eat out at budget smart spots only on the nights that crawl in the door from work and can barely move--his commute is nearly two hours each way and mine is nearly an hour each way. Why? Because the price of houses in our area is so outrageous. We bought a +100 year old 1500 sq ft house after our rent went up 47% in one year, and we bought it in the first town that was along our commute routes that we could afford. We eliminated everything we could (including meat) this winter to afford the oil to heat the house for our toddler. Many evenings we zipped her into a little bunting when she started looking a bit blue and began shivering. We are struggling to reach the standard of living we were raised with, nevermind an advanced standard. The only new construction homes in our area are the monster sized big box houses on big lots, we drive past thousands of them on our rides home every evening. Market demands??--They didn't ask us or any of our friends.
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